sophia: (playing ffxiv) these dungeons are kinda long
me: how long
sophia: idk 30-40 minutes
me: that’s not long
sophia: i mean i’m used to 10 minute WoW dungeo–
me: (starts shrieking) BACK IN MMMMYYYY DAYY
sophia: OH MY GOD
me: BACK IN MYYYY DAY WE WALKED UP HILL BOTH WAYS JUST TO *QUEUE* FOR ALTERAC VALLEY
sophia: YES I KNOW
me: AND WHEN WE FINALLY GOT IN WE STAYED FOR 14 HOURS AND WE LIKED IT
sophia: no you didn’t
me: no
me: we didn’t
*me petting my cat*
CAT: This is the happiest I will ever be
*a door opens*
CAT: Now is my chance to flee this prison and never return
Snape: What would three young Gryffindors such as yourselves be doing inside… on a day like this?
Hermione: Uh… Well… We… We were just…
Snape: You ought to be careful. People will think you’re…
Harry:
Ron:
Hermione:
Harry:
Ron:
Hermione:
Snape: …Up to something.
Two kinds of artists
One: And here’s my pile of sketchbooks I’ve finished!
Two: And here’s my pile of sketchbooks I’ve started and abandoned or haven’t even fucking drawn one line in yet
Straight Boys: Why are all the hot girls lesbians?
Lesbians: Why are all the hot girls straight?
Straight Girls: Why are all the hot guys gay?
Gay Guys: Why are all the hot guys straight?
Bisexual People: WHY ARE ALL THE HOT PEOPLE TAKEN?
Pansexual People: everyone is hot what do I do
Asexual People: what
The signs as vampires
Aries: Recklessâ„¢. Doesnt know how to cover up their tracks. Ends up hiring someone to do it for them. Skilled at speed walking.
Taurus: turns humans into vampires out of boredom. Accidentally creates a huge clan. Ends up a leader. Nice.
Gemini: the vampire that messes with everyone just because they’re immortal. Gets in trouble lots because they can get out of it easily. The vampire who accidentally ends up well known among other vampires by doing something stupid as hell.
Cancer: feels guilty all the time. Likes the perks though. Living forever is cool.
Leo: the vampire who thinks they could be part of the Avengers or some crap. Thinks they’re some kind of vampire superhero. Actually ends up being some really lonely vampire who longs for another half.
Virgo: always thinking of ways their kind can blend in with humans. Misses being human. Probably binges because they avoid eating for a long time.
Libra: the preppiest vampire ever. Who cares if we’re undead? Doesn’t mean we cant party and have a great fashion sense, am i right? Lets go become undead models in high fashion.
Scorpio: intensity increased by a million percent. Falls in love with a human. Appears like the stereotype but occasionally wishes they were human.
Sagittarius: no guilt whatsoever. Feels as if they’re the superior race so who tf gives a damn about stupid humans. Plays with their food.
Capricorn: always coming up with ways to take over the world. Vampires should be in charge. Humans are so dumb and temporary.
Aquarius: uses their abilities to help people. Mostly wishes everyone was a vampire so they could all look after themselves. The vampire that was shunned from their clan for being too “human like”.
Pisces: the coolest vampire ever. Uses their abilities to have fun. Thats it. You live forever so you might has well be eternally amused.
Nightmare Demon: KNEEL BEFORE ME MORTAL AS YOU FEEL YOUR LIFE SLOWLY LEAVE YOUR-
Cute tiny gf: I made chocolate chip cookies!
Nightmare Demon: Are they white chocolate?
Cute tiny gf: -Little nod-
Nightmare Demon: Alright give me a moment sir my honey’s cookies are the best warm