if tng characters had lizard babies
picard: also abandons them
bev: unphased because she fucked a lamp ghost before, sends them to starfleet academy, somehow get better grades than wesley
worf: keeps them because it’s honorable, but his parents are the ones who raise them and they’re thrilled about it
data: researches the best heat lamps, spot despises them and he has to put up a baby gate
geordi: confused by the entire thing, gives them to data
deanna: keeps them, lwaxana continually buys them little outfits and wants to take them on vacation
riker: keeps them, to everyone’s surprise, admits that he has had lizard babies before, to no one’s surprise, and tries to teach them about women
miles: has an existential crisis, the babies do not love him, they destroy the transporter regularly, and then they abandon him first
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