Month: October 2015

i’ve never actually seen loss jpg or whatever please explain to me

jasper-rolls:

this is a long story but its fucking great

okay so back in 2002 a man named tim buckley decided to start up a webcomic about videogames called ctrl+alt+del. this was its first strip

fucking stunning writing, i know. now it was early days, so you could argue that tim was just getting started, but the level of humor rarely went higher than this. despite proclaiming to be about videogames, the strip tended to focus more upon the idiotic antics of ethan (guy on the right), lucas (guy on the left), lilah, a female character introduced later on and zeke, a xbox robot ethan makes later on in order to be Wacky

the “comedy” usually came from ethan pretty much being so constantly a problem that it’s a wonder any of the characters hung around him at all, let alone extended periods of time. jokes were largely a set up followed by violence as the punchline, which might not be so bad if it wasn’t tim buckley’s go to punchilne when he couldn’t think of anything actually funny (which was a lot of the time). and it continually got worse as ethan continued to constantly be a burden to all his friends, yet they inexplicably couldn’t stop liking him and bowing to his every whim, even lucas, the alleged straight man to ethan’s manchild, and lilah, introduced as a No Nonsense Girl Gamer somehow becoming his boyfriend

in case you haven’t gotten it yet, ethan is very clearly tim buckley’s self insert fantasy.

the thing is, despite the comic being very obviously bad, it was REALLY popular. like it was an absolutely huge thing. teen boys absolutely lapped up the tired jokes and sitcom cliches and thats not even getting into the absolutely DIRE chef brian comics. actually no you know what i will go into them. here

this was about 2 years after the first strip, and you can start to see the art and comedy style that would come to define ctrl+alt+del as tim buckley pretty much officially gave up on putting effort into his comic

this was literally how he put together his comics: drawing hundreds of predrawn graphics and then sticking them into 4 panels

and since ctrl+alt+del was so popular, it REALLY went to tim buckley’s head. he refused (and really still refuses) to take any kind of criticism. he became very egotistical (he sued a fan for making a flash featuring the CAD characters) and there are some reports of him doing pretty shady things over the internet

and then he hit on his greatest idea

instead of sticking with comedy in a 4 panel strip format, he decided to introduce drama. characters growing up, getting married, learning responsibility…while STILL sticking rigidly to the comics newspaper esque 4 panel format.

everyone who knew CAD was awful was already making fun of tim desperately trying to introduce pathos into his verse of xbox robots and manchild antics, but his ego was bigger than it had ever been and he couldn’t be dissuaded, and in 2008 he had the storyline in which ethan and lilah get married, and lilah becomes pregnant

and then, just to ratchet up the drama, tim buckley decided lilah would miscarry.

the internet fucking lost it. a moment intended to carry great drama and meaning instead became the funniest unintentional comedy ever written. thousands upon thousands of edits and parodies were made (a sampling can be found here. some of them are pretty gross tho, being ripped from 4chan, so be careful) and its a moment thats become heavily engrained in internet/videogame culture. its gotten to the point where the most simplistic form of representing this comic (a series of straight lines) can be immediately recognisable as making fun of this strip

i didnt explain this in the greatest way and im sure someone can do it more elegantly since i skipped a few things but really the entire history of ctrl+alt+del is an amazing chronicle of one man’s ego

afterthelonely:

one of my favourite things in the entire world is when there’s a huge thunderstorm outside and it’s raining heavily and you’re in bed swathed in blankets and you have just never felt warmer and safer than you do in that moment

benchflip: Ryp-Alfolken (Frost Elves) are an eerie offshoot of meadow alfolk who travelled north with their mountainous cousins during the early age of man. Unlike the Nidin Alfolken (Great elves), the frost elves do not keep their reverence of the twinned gods in balance.

benchflip:

Ryp-Alfolken (Frost Elves) are an eerie offshoot of meadow alfolk who travelled north with their mountainous cousins during the early age of man. Unlike the Nidin Alfolken (Great elves), the frost elves do not keep their reverence of the twinned gods in balance. Instead, they take their worship only to that of the god of Death Codex and live in the considerably harsher climate to exemplify this. To say they’re faithful- if not a little melodramatic is a bit of an understatement.
In recent years, a shift in leadership has left them no longer pursuing quiet and beautiful funeral rites, but a further understanding of the realm of entropy, leading their rituals to grow considerably darker and considerably bloodier. Their motives at this point are unknown, but it is certainly advised to stay clear of the northern roads of Nidinis from now on, lest you end up falling into one of their sacrificial pits.

Frost Elves are identified by their:
Ears
Considerably longer than most other alfolk with the exception of the mountainous variety. 
Clothing While many alfolk have taken to using a complex, iridescent dye known as Soul-silk in their garments, Ryp Alfolken take it to an extreme. They weave it into their thick, padded clothing in tight braids and even their undergarments are decorated with it
Lack of Identum – Most other alfolk usually have their identum/Soul colour represented in parts of their body. Ryp Alfolk have no reflection of their identum anywhere in their body and so give off a blueish, grey/white hue. To other alf, this gives them the appearance of the recently deceased, whom lose their identum within minutes after death.
Flat Feet – Other than meadow and marsh alfolk, Ryp alfolk stand upon flat feet and for extremely logicial reasons? They most definitely wear shoes.
Eyes of Entropy – In recent years, Ryp alfolk have taken on an interesting and unsettling discolouration of their eyes. What were once a distinct icy blue have turned dark with even darker sclera. Before they grew too dangerous to associate with, many tradesmen often compared their gaze to a shark’s. Black, glossy, ever so slightly noticeable iris that is constantly locked onto you, even as they walk by with seeming disinterest. The Nidin Alf call it the eyes of entropy, as it reminds them of the very void itself.
Missing Limbs – While not consistent with most Ryp Alfolk, a small number in higher power are missing either one or both arms. Many believe this to be ceremonious reasons, or due to poor health. What makes this more peculiar is that in spite of their seeming loss of limb, clothing folds around the stub seem to stand like the limb is still intact. Many theorize this to be an act of carnomancy, or some entropic embrace.
Voice – Almost every single Ryp Alfolk have a deep passion for music, specifically regarding their voice. This traces back to their early days from performing funeral rites for mass burials. The songs they sing are sombre, but beautiful. If you can not see them when being stalked through the frozen woods at night, you most certainly will hear them. Their songs now play a vital role in spellcasting, as well as a final send off into their sacrificial pits.

(Pictured are Ellistra Saprani and Setavoi von Tenore in their soul dyed undies :> )

tmirai: Contributor commission for Razumi of their high elf dragon Jikal Atka. I had a lot of fun with the lighting effects for this one. Thank you again for your contribution!

tmirai:

Contributor commission for Razumi of their high elf dragon Jikal Atka. I had a lot of fun with the lighting effects for this one. Thank you again for your contribution!

brothersemberfell: Thordemar and Acreles at the Iron Front. Whoever said Bladestorm was messy made an understatement. snarel

brothersemberfell:

Thordemar and Acreles at the Iron Front. Whoever said Bladestorm was messy made an understatement.

snarel