All you’ve ever wanted was to be feared and rule the world but every villainous act you commit backfires. Steal candy from a baby? Poisoned candy, baby saved. Steal the baby? Abusive parents. Threw a woman off a building? Push she needed to unlock her powers of flight, she’s now your sidekick.
Newly acquired toddler: Mr. Evil man you sure are helping a lot of people.
Villain: Finish eating your lunch, Timmy. Daddy’s plotting to overthrow the Big Bank.
Sidekick: Oh that’s great, John! They’re so corrupt. I’ll cancel my plans with Linda tonight. She’s gonna love this.
Villain: *crumples up evil plans and throws them across the room* DAMMIT!
*the plans land in the recycling bin*