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unclefather:

glumshoe:

glumshoe:

My grandmother is a bitter old crab with nothing good to say about anything, but she does have a few good stories. She confronted the woman my grandfather had been cheating on her with – this other woman had no idea he was married, and was righteously angry.

The two of them schemed together. My grandfather’s mistress drove her convertible to the construction site where he was working. As he approached the car, she said, “Why didn’t you tell me you were married?”

“Married?! I’m not married!” he said.

My grandmother sat up in the back seat, where she’d been lying down, and said, “You won’t be for much longer.”

After they divorced, my grandfather begged my grandmother to come back to him. “I’ll marry you again if you buy me a house full of furniture,” she said.
“Deal,” said my grandfather.

So they got married again, he bought her the house full of furniture….. and then she divorced him.

Again.

I am this petty

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