i work as a barista & people tell me all the time that The Drinks Got Gender. Thats A Lady Coffee, people try to say

its fucking bean water

can’t believe i can’t just reply to this but: maybe they’re actually telling you that this coffee has an important status. Lady Coffee

oh shit i was in the presence of bean water royalty oh fuck i must have looked like such a rube. such a fool.

what the fuck does this post mean ive been trying to decipher its hieroglyphic encrypted message but i cant

“From a deconstructionist stand point, I have to disagree with a large portion of the customers that I, a humble barista tend to each day. The assertion that certain coffee drinks are more suitable for one gender or another is folly. For as we know: 1. gender is a social construct, & 2. coffee of any type is simply hot water strained through roasted beans, & has no greater affect on either culturally assigned sex.”

“What ho, kind friend! Is it not unfortunate that I cannot simply reply to this post, & most reblog it? What a farce, this blue website! Ah, but I digress: what if perhaps your customers were not asserting not the suitability of the drink for a given gender, but rather indicating some matter of status? Perhaps the coffee is possessing of a high rank in society. This is of course my purely grammatical viewpoint on the subject.”

“Oh, damnation! This does in fact seem much more likely than my own ludicrous assumptions, & I was no doubt in the presence of roasted bean royalty! Some emissary from foreign soil! Curses! What a country bumpkin I’ve made myself out to be!!”