i know everyone and their grandmother is taking potshots at the new twilight novel but honest to god i have so many questions, so many things i needed to know in the agonizing hours occupying the space between “knew this thing exists” and “got my filthy, goblin hands on a copy,” and my first and most pressing being what are we going to do now that jacob black doesn’t have a knot? how does renesmee work in this universe – does she exist in this universe? would she have existed? if edward is the one who is against having the baby, would edythe have carried it given the reverse situation? would edward’s body – unable to change, age, or grow, even conceive a child? would there be a vampire abortion? would there, in this universe, have to be some kind of fanfic-style cis-dude mpreg for beaufort slash bella swan to fulfill her destiny of being a zombie vampire babychild incubation machine? and like, in a universe where the dynamics of half of the familial and romantic relationships are predicated on gender roles learned and assigned in like, the mid 19th and 20th fucking centuries, how does rosalie’s storyline even work? she was only a vampire because of a) her relative class status b) the existence and enactment of gender-based violence in the depression era,  jasper was only a vampire because he was an active confederate soldier in texas during the southern vampire wars, would alice’s institutionalization and torture have even happened if she’d been a man? would carlisle have been a doctor? is edythe going to take the role of stalker slash protector without the hovering obligation of antiquated gender roles? how does leah’s struggle with the hypermasculinity assigned to her as a werewolf play out if she’s like, a dude, how does the whole lowkey racist narrative about quileute men being unable to control their violent, animalistic impulses because they’re native ameri– excuse me, werewolves, play out if all of them are women. i have been sending frantic, screaming voice memos about this to several people tonight and my only regret is that this was the way you all had to find out that not only did i read twilight but i am heavily emotionally invested in the consistency of the twilight universe’s internal logic buT LIKE FOR REAL IS THERE GOING TO BE MPREG IN THIS? IS BEAUFORT (BEAUFORT!!!) SWAN GONNA HAVE A BABY. WHAT HORRIFYING PORTMANTEAU IS RENESMEE GONNA SUFFER THROUGH THIS TIME