“Ace Hardware: No screwing, just lots of screws.”

“Ace Hardware: Nail your roof, not your partner.”

“Ace Hardware: For when it really is just a hammer in your pocket”

One of my friends wanted to see a photomanip of the ace hardware logo in ace flag colors, and then I thought of these terrible puns, so here you go.

At first I wasn’t going to reblog this but then I saw it again and just started laughing

my two favorite things: asexuality, and puns

and those puns are literally the best

I NEED more asexual puns

those are indeed the best

“Ace Hardware: Lube for your motor, not your junk”

“Ace Hardware: Erecting buildings, not your penis”

“Ace Hardware: Where nuts aren’t genetalia”

“Ace Hardware: The hammer is not our penis. Its just a hammer.”

“Ace Hardware: Where muff, is short for muffler”

“Ace Hardware: Yes that is a hammer, but we’re still happy to see you.”

“Ace Hardware: You can get Off in our repellent aisle”