Elune: “Now, for the next step of our night elf recipe, add your dark trolls to your Well of Eternity. If you don’t have organic dark trolls store-bought is fine.”
Advice for the Signs!
Aries: Drink More Water!
Taurus: Go for a morning jog!
Gemini: Contact an old friend!
Cancer: Do something that scares you!
Leo: Go to bed early!
Virgo: Kill a man!
Libra: Take a warm bath!
Scorpio: Watch your favorite movie!
Sagittarius: STOP INFORMING TUMBLR USER BREASTFORCE5 THAT THEY FORGOT SAGITTARIUS IN THAT ONE FUCKING HORRORSCOPE POST. JESUS. FUCKING. CHRIST. I GET IT. I FUCKED UP. PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE. I HAVE FORTY FUCKING MESSAGES IN MY ASKBOX LETTING ME I KNOW I FORGOT YOUR FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT SIGN. FORTY. THAT’S AS MANY AS FOUR TENS. IS THAT REALLY FUCKING NECESSARY?
Capricorn: Spend time with a loved one!
Aquarius: Do some pilates!
Pices: Finish something you’re working on!
Lady Macbeth: is that a dagger in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
Macbeth: i’m just happy to see you 😉
Lady Macbeth: pathetic
Ugh traffic
my rival: please.. we can lay down our weapons. it doesn’t have to be like this. we don’t need to fight. we can settle this another way. i don’t want to fight
me, immediately swinging my sword: too bad i fucking want to, buddy
older generation: u all get too offended 2 easily
gay people: *exist*
older generation: oh my GOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
Plus side of shipping with me: i will always be here to scream ideas and headcanons at and i will be screaming more along with you.
Downside of shipping with me: you will eventually come to the conclusion that i am satan.
Me: [sees an elf]
Me: I love them. I LOVE THEM