drovie:

helalthehallowed:

mumuringdarkness:

ethalarian:

mumuringdarkness:

ethalarian:

mumuringdarkness:

angelas-extrasandstuff:

I would like to share this beautiful passage with all of you, it’s long, but worth it. And I swear to god I didn’t alter any of this. 

….

Her long hair, still wet from the shower, had been combed down her back in a wet swath. Hilda was sitting on the floor, her round, wet boobs still wet from the shower’s water. She dried off the water with a towel, which then became wet.

Hilda gasped when she saw a reflection in her bedroom mirror: through the slightly open door, she caught a glimpse of the chiseled abs and square jaw of the mysterious stranger who shared her cabin. She stood and spun around, her breasts swinging heavily with the momentum. She grabbed the door and flung it open, revealing shirtless Torolf (which is seriously his name) quivering with desire in the hallway.

Torolf was ashamed at being caught, but his shame made him even hotter – hotter for sex. He stepped into the room, and his bulging abs accidentally smushed into Hilda’s rich chest.

As Hilda’s buttermilk bosoms squished up against his granite abs, Torolf almost had a dick aneurysm.
“Hilda,” Torolf murmured thickly, his throbbing meat wand pressing against Hilda’s warm thighs. “There is a secret I need to not tell you: You are my forbidden desire.”

Hilda had been waiting to hear these words. Her heart was lifted on golden wings and soared toward a radiant sun of perfect joy. She saw herself and Torolf happy together, bathed in the golden light of love. Her snooch got all warm, too.

“Torolf,” Hilda moaned, her lush teats straining with desire. “I need you.”
Torolf, coarse abs pulsing softly in the moonlight, stood silently.
Hilda looked at him expectantly.
“Oh, sorry,” she added. “Torolf, I need you – sexually.”

At hearing those beautiful words, Torolf flexed his rough-hewn abs and Hilda found herself being guided to her soft bed by the sheer force of Torolf’s undulating midsection. She parted her thighs in anticipation, exposing the soft pink petals of her clunge.

Torolf entered her like she was a lottery. His engorged pecker pushed inside her and she felt fulfilled with sexual fulfillment.

Hilda clutched at the bedsheets with lust and ecstasy and her hands. Her spongy love mountains hurled to and fro with each pounding. Her body was like a beautiful flower that was opening and somebody was pushing their dick inside it.

Then Torolf moaned, arched his back, and suffered from dick Parkinson’s. He pumped in all of his hot pearlescent sperms as Hilda spasmed with so many orgasms!

The two lay still for a moment as the stinky scent of lovemaking billowed around the room.
Hilda got out of bed, still shimmering with orgasm. She glowed with contentment, like a cat who ate the cream of the crop.

She walked across the room and picked up her towel, still wet with shower water. “Torolf,” she said softly, “there’s something I have to tell you…”

But her bed was empty.

Torolf was gone, escaped out the bedroom window. In the distance, Hilda heard the fading sound of galloping abs.

( @myvado-chambers As I said, Myv looks like I romance cover hero….just….don’t. do. THIS. )

what are you talking about this is clearly a work of literary genius

Yes, actually you’re right, I’m sure the Junior High Creative writing class would be very proud of the one student who decided to jerk one out and managed to spew this nonsense. I mean, thats a feat in and of itself LOL

I refuse to believe this isn’t satire. I mean it has to be. …right?

Its a trashy romance novel. Sadly….those are all like this. I used to find them here and there in houses I used to clean and would read a passage out of curiosity. THEY WERE ALL THAT BAD. I’m really not sure how its possible that this material is being published. I mean I have no problem with the content, but holy shit is the vocabulary and grammar bad!! Its just……BAD WRITING. LOL

“Her body was like a beautiful flower that was opening and somebody was pushing their dick inside it.”

 I cant breathe someone help

I don’t usually reblog things like this. But @tevruden, see this? This is where I read the whole.. Hilda found herself being guided to her soft bed by the sheer force of Torolf’s undulating midsection .. and could only picture Abathur.

… abathur is moonlighting as Torolf. That’s why it’s galloping abs to get away, Abathur can’t ride a mount. And some part of that body could be seen as abs?