knitmeapony:

comparativelysuperlative:

snarp:

Seemingly-normal small town is, in fact, normal!

But it’s surrounded on all sides by all those other small towns, and it’s where the courthouse is.

“You know how half the people from that seaside town always say the other half look a bit…off? Queer narrow heads with flat noses and bulgy, starry eyes? Well, we’ve finally got a discrimination case.”

“Alien mind control isn’t usually admissible, but if you can get one of their psy-beam operators to testify as an expert then we’ll talk.”

“I’m not signing a search warrant based on a dream you had, no matter how many people had the same one!”

“That case out of Punxsutawney has been on today’s docket every day for months. Did someone leave the groundhog on again?”

“Turns out a town made entirely of people who secretly worship Ba’al Berith might have some establishment of religion issues. Who knew?”

“As a matter of law, the house is haunted.”